What plastic surgery would make Santa Claus look better?
Well, first of all, he should hold off on some of those fattening cookies and switch to skim milk. This may allow him to lose a few pounds and improve his morbid obesity. As far as plastic surgery, his nose is the major problem. He suffers from rhinophyma, a condition where the nose becomes bulbous and red from overgrowth of sebaceous glands. This is often connected to out-of-control rosacea. Bill Clinton appears to have rhinophyma too.
Santa's nose can be whittled down using lasers, loop cautery, or even just a simple scalpel blade. Then he would look more like Ashlee Simpson.
Merry Christmas to you! May God bless you and your families.
Thanks for reading.
Michigan-based Plastic Surgeon
Anthony Youn, M.D.:
Hilarious! I agree that both Santa and Rudolph probably have rhinophyma. Tough to diagnose since I've never met either in person.
ReplyDeleteI like to use scissors to correct rhinophyma, but CO2 laser, loop cautery, etc., are all reasonable options too. If Santa or Rudolph ever show up in my office, we'll discuss the risks and benefits, with attention to a prompt recovery--long before Xmas 2010!